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The Dating Yourself Revelation


It's another Friday night and I'm bored as sin. There's nothing on cable, or television for that matter. I'm tired of reading books, and there's no one to talk to on the telephone because they're out with their boyfriend or girlfriend. What was I going to do again? I loved Fridays because they stipulated the end of the work week, but I hated Fridays because I had no man in my life, and no plans whatsoever.

I'd call my sister one more time. If she was doing something, I was going to tag along with her. I couldn't spend another Friday night alone, and bored to tears out of my skull. Please deliver me from the antics of being jaded. I was going to lose my mind in the process if I didn't find something to do and fast.

I dialed my sister's number, and waited for her to pick up the telephone. She was a year older than me, and I could never find Shirley at home. The woman had a life and then some.

The phone rang three times, and I knew her answering machine would be coming on soon. I was about to hang up when I heard the click. "Hello," she said.

"Why are you so out of breath?" I replied.

"I was just getting in, but I'm on my way back out," Shirley replied. "What's going on?"

"I wanted to know what you were doing so I could get into my car and join you. I'm so bored stiff, I can't spend another night in this apartment alone. I'm going to end up in a mental institute Shirley. Please help me!"

"I'm going out with James, and my girlfriend, Angela. We're going to the west side to hang out at her favorite club, and I'll probably be spending the night at her house. It's going to be late when I get home, and James refuse to drive at night. You know how my husband is. This is the first time I could get him to go with me, so I'm not going to rain on his parade."

I frowned because I wasn't about to spend time on the west side of Chicago with someone I didn't know, and it was out of the question of me staying in her house too. "I don't think I'll be coming with you. Maybe the two of us can plan something next Friday. I'm about to lose my mind from sheer boredom."

"Why did you end your relationship with Rain? He was set in his ways, but he adored you?"

I frowned at the mention of Rain's name. I didn't want to think about the man. He was a less of a man, but you couldn't explain his faults to him. I was alone, so I might as well be alone by myself. "Rain is dead and boring, Shirley. The only thing he cares about is making money, and his television. If all televisions disappeared into the heavens, then Rain would go right up to heaven with them. He didn't give a hoot about entertaining his young girlfriend. I'm done with him."

"He used to take you everywhere, and now he's settled in his ways."

"We used to have so much fun, but now he thinks I'm supposed to make my own plans with other people while he stays under the television for the rest of his life, and then some. I can't believe I wasted so much of my time with the old goat. I should have known a man eleven years older than me was a hideous plight. What was I thinking?

"I'll talk to you later, Francine. If you change your mind just call me, and come down."

I frowned again. "I won't, but thanks."

I hung up the telephone and flipped the channels. I found an episode of LIVING SINGLE on, and settled back to watch it. I was going to suffer on this Friday night, and there wasn't anything I could do about it. I plan on following the same routine Saturday night too. Maybe I could find a part time job working Friday and Saturday nights? I had to do something on the weekends.

After watching an hour of LIVING SINGLE, I got inspired. One of the characters in the sitcoms, Kim Fields decided to date herself. I thought she was losing her mind, but she was fed up with the dating scene, and the dating games, and went to this seminar on the sitcom. The speaker told them to stop worrying about other people granting your happiness, but to find happiness within yourselves. The female speaker was so right, and it was time for me to make that move. I'd be bored rigid the rest of this weekend, but next weekend I was going to date myself. What a new concept and a revelation. I just hoped I could stand being with me. I laughed at the thought.

Another work week ended, and it was another Friday night. This time I was going out to dinner. My date was me, myself, and I. At first I didn't think I could pull this off, but I was dressed in a nice skirt and blouse, and I was on my way to my favorite restaurant, Bennigan's on Michigan Avenue in Chicago, Illinois. I went there with a few friends, and boyfriends, but I never ventured alone. I just hoped I didn't get cold feet. I had never dated myself before.

I took a deep breath and headed to my car. It was time to go out on my first date with myself. Why not?

At Bennigan's I found a table in the back, and felt uncomfortable because the place had to be crowded of all days. I reached for the menu and was bent on having some fun. I didn't have to make conversation with anyone, and pretend that I was having a good time. I loved myself, so I knew I was going to have the time of my life. I ended up ordering a steak and the works with my favorite drink, a Matai. The drink was delicious, and it gladly got me into the mood. I bought a good book to read, and in the middle of feeding my face, I was reading a DANIELLE STEELE book, my favorite author. I had all her books, and couldn't wait for the next one to come out. So far, so good with this dating myself theme; I was truly comfortable now.

Two hours later I was still at the restaurant, and enjoying my book. Ms. Steele was a talented writer. Three men tried joining me, but I refused to have any men at my table because I was dating myself, and no one could interfere with my date. I took two of their phone numbers, but I didn't know if I was going to call them. I was having a grand time just being by myself. It felt good.

When I stopped at the middle of my book, I checked my cell phone to see what time it was. It was five hours later. I couldn't believe it. I had a delicious meal, and yummy chocolate cake for desert. I sipped three Matai's, and I wasn't drunk, but in a very good mood. My date was over, and I was impressed with me. I think I'll take myself out again. I really enjoyed myself, and had a good time.

On Saturday night I took myself to the movies. I wanted to see HUSTLE AND FLOW with that handsome Terrance Howard, with the gorgeous eyes, so I went alone. I was so nervous because I knew the theater would be crowded with bodies, but I wasn't going to back out. I had a ball last night, so this night would be even better.

I came twenty minutes early for the movie, and was able to get my ticket, a hotdog, popcorn, and a diet soda. I found the perfect seat in the middle of the theatre. The movie was old now, so everyone had gone to see it, so I was lucky because the theatre wasn't that full.

As the previews were over, and the movie started, I was lucky enough to find a seat without anyone sitting next to me. I smiled all over myself because again, I was having the time of my life. I liked dating me.

Terrence Howard wasn't only handsome, but he was a very talented actor. I loved this movie, and Oscar buzz was definitely a possibility. He had it going on and then some. The man could act, and the rest of the cast, including Anthony Anderson was also a superb group of talented actors. Director John Singleton should be very proud of himself because he did a very fine job on this movie.

I was disappointed when the movie ended, but I'd always remember it because I came alone. I couldn't believe I had mastered this plan without any drawbacks. I was truly on my way to dating heaven, and I didn't need another human being to make my life. I had me. What a revelation!

The dating myself trend continued for the rest of the month. I went to beaches alone, museums, Six Flags, and the boat to gamble some of my hard earned money away. Now the boat trip was very informative and interesting. It was a weekend trip, and I enjoyed the ride because I got caught up on my rest, and was able to stay in a nice hotel, eat, and gamble.

I also won three hundred dollars on the quarter machine, and then I headed away from the casinos. I knew when to grab my winnings, and keep stepping. Of course I met a couple of men, but that was always the case when you didn't want to be bothered. I ignored most of them and didn't get any numbers this time because I was determined to date myself. Men were just a pain in my backside for now. I just didn't want to be disturbed.

On the bus back home, I stared out the window because sleep wasn't happening with a smile on my face. My weekends were so wonderful now because I had plenty of things to do that included me, and only me. I wasn't going to date a man probably for the rest of my life because I had me. Who needed men when I had myself? I hysterically laughed because the revelation of dating yourself wasn't an ancient myth after all. It was a code of learning to love and be with yourself. If you could date yourself, then you have a better understanding of whom and what you are. Maybe I'll meet that man, but I'm learning that it doesn't take anyone to make my Friday and Saturday nights. I had the power to lift my boredom, and do something about it. What an eye opener for me! I think I'm going to take myself to a ball game next Friday. What a dating revelation I was on, and I was having the time of my life. Again, who needed men and women? I had myself, and I loved me. (1,880)

My name is Carol Ann Culbert Johnson. I work at the Advocate Beverly Center in Chicago, Illinois. Please check out my website at: http://www.freewebs.com/jcarolann Check out my debut book, I CONFESS.


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