List Categories | List All Articles | List Articles By Title
Getting To The Root Of Unhappiness
Many people live in clutter, emotionally eat themselves into overweight, live in debt, hate their jobs and otherwise live unhappy lives, unable and seemingly unwilling to change. Why? What do these have in common? What is the core issue?
Fear, or rather an absence of love.
Fear, and not hate, is the "dark side" or opposite/absence of love, the way darkness is the opposite/absence of light.
Whether your self image is controlled by unhealthy or uncontrolled overweight or fanatic perfection, both stem from fear. In the first, food is used to comfort upset emotions and to retreat into - a true friend that never lets you down. In the latter (and sometimes the former), control over the body supplants a loss of control elsewhere in life, eventually taking over that life.
Clutter is almost always fear-based - fear of not having something and needing it, fear of getting rid of something important, fear of leaving oneself open to new experiences (which can't come in because your house - and by extension your life - is already full) and fear of being alone with oneself and one's thoughts (clutter requires so much of our energy to deal with and work around, it can serve as a sort of mental static to keep us too busy to think about important things).
Debt is another symptom of fear - people get into debt for many fear-based reasons (like needing stuff to make themselves feel better, or for fear of not keeping up with the Jones' and being socially outcast). Another part to this equation is that many people will not get rid of their access to credit (cut up cards, etc) because there is always that "what if an emergency happens and we don't have cash on hand to pay for it?" which is made moot by the fact that most of their credit cards are maxed out anyway. Debt is also a symptom of the fear of doing without, even when carried to extremes. The fear of going without and the feelings of "being without" fancy clothes or expensive meals out is no less than the fear and experience of going without basic clothing and food, although the reality is different.
Working at a job you hate is nothing but fear - fear of not having enough, fear of quitting and not being able to find other work (or finding it and being stuck with something even worse), fear of not being to keep up with your "stuff habit" or your debt, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of relying on yourself, fear of doing things differently or out-of-the-box (running your own business, running off to Mexico, etc), fear of letting the family down, fear of "wasting" your education, fear of what other will say, think, fear that your mom/dad/sister/evil art teacher were right and so on.
Fear is the basis for pretty much all human suffering, not counting natural disasters and other acts of God. And the opposite of fear is love. Love creates an ecosphere of calm and plenty, because you know there is enough (if only just enough) and so feel no need to "get mine before someone else does." Nor do you feel the need to hoard (clutter) or gather in more than you can afford (debt) to assure yourself of plenty. In a world of love, all are accepted and loved for their own personal strengths and forgiven their faults, therefore negating the need for drowning in the comfort of stuff and food (debt and overweight), or worrying about what others will think if you quit your job to become a Mexican portrait painter (toxic job). And on and on.
Learn to live with love, for yourself and for others, even when they don't meet your standards (even the rich and awful deserve your love, for they serve their purpose, too). Creating a world of love is up to each of us. We cannot wait to see if others take the first step. They are waiting for us.
(c) Soni Pitts
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Soni Pitts is the Chief Visionary Butt-Kicker of SoniPitts.Com. She specializes in helping others reclaim "soul proprietorship" in their lives and to begin living the life their Creator always intended for them.
She is the author of the free e-book "50 Ways To Reach Your Goals" and over 100 self-help and inspirational articles, as well as other products and resources designed to facilitate this process of personal growth and spiritual development.
Body, Mind, and Soul
Being in tune with your mind, body, and soul and how they work is the one most important thing you can do for yourself. We know now that, the three work together.
Happiness as a Habit
Health and Happiness are the two things that most people will tell you they desire most. Ask a parent what they want most for their child and they will almost always say, "I really don't care, as long as they are healthy and happy.
Top 25 Happiness Quotations
"There are hundreds of languages in the world, but a smile speaks them all."--Anonymous"Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response.
But I Bought All The Books And Tapes, And Im Still Unhappy!
I love this quote by Zig Ziglar, and think it's a perfect introduction to this article:"People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing- that's why we recommend it daily.
Joy Is Sexy
Joy is sexy because in embracing our joy, we embrace our positive energy and power. Joy is always there, waiting to be reclaimed.
Life Purpose: How To Be in Love with Life
Falling In Love with LifeThere is no feeling in the world like the feeling of energized, on purpose living.Have you ever been in love? You smile easily, you lie in bed for a little longer in the morning letting yourself dream and everything you do seems to have more color, more depth.
Gratitude For Dummies
Yes, it might feel great to win the lottery. Money, houses, travel - these are wonderful, but not enough by themselves.
Finding Purpose and Meaning in Life
A friend once said to me, "There is no meaning in life, except what we create". At the time, I thought she was nuts.
10 Easy Ways You Can Feel Happier, Be Healthier and Live Longer Starting NOW!
Let's just say? first thing when you popped out of bed this morning, you woke up and found a little yellow post-it note stuck on the bathroom mirror that could transform your life. You smiled, instantly recognizing this very familiar word.
What Is Happiness?
What is it that everyone is seeking? Happiness with no sorrow. A continuous happiness with no taint whatsoever of sorrow.
Happiness. Its Between Our Ears!
Happiness is something we all seek, yet few of us find-Some search for it an acquiring material possessions-Some search for it in experiencing pleasant sensations-Some search for it in seeking the approval of others-Some search for it in the exercising of power-Some search for it in the love of money-Some search for it in the quest for successYes, Happiness is something we all seek, and yet for most it is something that comes, then slips away, to be always just out of reach. Why? Is life really unfair? Aren't we meant to be happy? Are we being punished?The interesting thing is that all these ways that people search for happiness, and the questions they ask when they don't find it, have one thing in common.
5 Keys to Understanding Why Your Life (probably) Sucks! #2
In Key Reason #1 we looked at how you are working with outdated beliefs. Reason # 2 gives a clue as to why that might be so.
A Surefire Way To Manage Your Fears While Leading A Happier, Healthier Life
Imagine discovering a way to get rid of your fears in a quick and painless manner. In fact it can even become fun!Did you know only two of all the fears you have are innate: The fear of falling and the fear of loud noises.
"The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet." -James OppenheimToday is very special.
How do we smile at each other? Is there a message communicated between us as we smile? Does it convey the depth of our feelings we have for each other? Take note of how our smiles deepen in feeling toward each other as our relationship grows and time passes. Note how our smiles reflect our joy as we pass time together without insignificant complaints.
Having Fun with Life
It was just a few degrees shy of swimming weather a few weeks ago at the beach. I walked along the shore in my jeans and a red tankini top, the salt air refreshing against my skin but not quite cold.
What is Happiness and How to Achieve It?
True happiness is such a rare commodity that the whole of the world is continuously seeking it and failing to find it. All the people, who we consider to be the best in their fields, are seeking it too and failing to acquire it.
Living a Balanced Life - The Real Juggling Act
I just read an installment from another self-improvement course that states that celebrities are unhappy because they don't have gratitude for what they have. I disagree.
Healthy, Wealthy and Happy in 2005
Life is simple. You'd be surprised to know that most of the cherished things in life are almost at arm length and not too expensive either.
Finding Your Life Purpose
You have a purpose in life. You have a unique gift or special talent.
home | site map
All articles are copyright to their owners.
Note: this website lists articles, We do not Write Articles !