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Confident Kids : Why Some Parents Should Carry a Health Warning
As a hypnotherapist, I am acutely aware of the power of words. A few well-chosen words can induce hypnosis and help my clients with a wide range of problems. I specialise in confidence, self esteem and stress management, so I am particularly interested in the ways in which we influence our own self esteem, and that of others, through use of language.
It makes me wince sometimes, listening to parents speaking to their children. "Are you stupid?" "You naughty boy!" and a personal un-favourite "If you carry on like this you're going to . . . "
Don't these parents realise what they're doing? Everything we say -- to ourselves and to others -- has predictive power. Not in the sense of a clairvoyant, but because we are creating self-fulfilling prophecies. Tell yourself that you can, and you will. Tell yourself that you can't, and you won't.
Of course, life isn't simply a matter of setting ourselves up with cosy predictions. We still have to do the work. But without self belief, that work becomes harder because it seems impossible. This applies to people of all ages. Just think how much more powerful words are for children, particularly when they come from an authority figure such as a parent or teacher.
How can parents best help their children? Positive parenting is a good first step -- focus on rewarding 'good' behaviours rather than punishing 'bad'ones. We can go much further than this, however. We can set our children up for success, relaxation and happiness.
An example from my own family may help. To encourage my nine year old's writing I asked him to imagine walking through town when he's grown up and entering a bookshop. There's something familiar about the display in front of him, and as he draws nearer he sees his own name and photo on the dust cover. It's a strong image and one which has struck a chord with him. We chat about this from time to time, and he's started to ask about literary agents and the whole process of getting a book published. In other words, he's made the transition towards believing that he could be an author.
Children are exceptionally trusting. Describe happy futures and they will work towards these with the same energy which they put into Christmas present lists. Above all, we need to mind our language as parents, and ask ourselves what predictions we are making for our children when we speak to them.
Jim Sullivan is a hypnotherapist specialising in confidence, self esteem and stress management. He may be contacted via http://www.confidenceclub.net
Putting Your Child To Bed
Are you glad for the chance to put your child to bed? Is this a great time for you and your kids or is it serious business? Is it a time in your day you look forward to, or do you have to grit your teeth to face the struggle? Bedtime is a terrific opportunity for us and our children. Spending just a few minutes with each of our children at bedtime can offer us the chance to really connect with them in ways that during the day, which is often hectic, it is much more difficult.
How Fathers Can Step Up to Fathering
When our oldest son was 2, my wife went out of town for a weekend. When a friend of hers called and I told her she was out of town, she said"So you're home baby-sitting.
This article on parenting is by a practicing relationship counsellor/therapist, and father.The following suggestions will be useful for any parent or caregiver who wants to improve their relationships with their children.
Teenagers Taking Risks
It can be hard being a parent with a teen going through what I term the 'I'm Invincible' phase. This is the phase when teens start doing scary and dangerous things (according to us parents) as a way of testing out their physical limits.
Friends Are A Gift You Give Yourself
My oldest boy is fifteen and was a real jerk about a month ago. He had gotten pretty full of himself and acted like he was too cool for the rest of the family.
Reclaiming Her Identity: A Mothers Diary
After giving up my profession to become a wife, a mother of one, then suddenly seven made life very taxing for me. I soon came face to face with a challenging question.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Results of the Spanking Poll on Rexanne.com: Voters - 233Percentage of readers who do not spank their children: 37%Percentage of readers who spank their children: 62%~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I am completely opposed to spanking.
How Often Does Child Sexual Abuse Get Reported?
Not nearly as often as it should. Most child abuse victims never report the crime or get help in coming to grips with this life-changing trauma.
Detox To Help Conception
Detox To Conceive..
Childrens Discipline: How To Resolve Divorce Parenting Differences?
Did you know that inconsistency on matters of discipline gives double messages, produces anxiety and can be very confusing to your children? Children need to know where they stand in their behaviors. It is therefore critical for parents to resolve their differences in matters of children's discipline.
Think Like Your Kids - And Understand Them More!
Seven-year old Michael was on a school trip to a Wildlife Centre in Central Scotland. It was near the end of the day and they were in the Gift Shop before boarding the bus for the journey home.
Parents Complaints --- Arrogant Public Schools Turn a Deaf Ear
School authorities continually claim that they want more parent cooperation and participation in their children's education. They complain when parents don't show up for parent-teacher conferences or push their children to do their homework.
10 Tips for Making Daily Physical Activity Part of Your Childs Life!
Here's some of the bad news about sedentary lifestyles:? Forty percent of children ages 5 to 8 show at least one heart disease risk factor, including hypertension and obesity, which among children has doubled over the past two decades.? The first signs of arteriosclerosis (hardening of the arteries) are appearing at age 5 - something never before seen in anyone under the age of 30.
Clean Your House Green for your Children's Sake
My thirteen-year-old daughter recently called me up to say she had cleaned the whole kitchen and bathroom herself. So many emotions ran through me at that moment.
Childs Play: Treating The Insanity of the Mental Health System
In today's mental health system there is a pattern of fraud and coercion that takes way the freedoms and dignity of children and their families. Children are receiving stigmatizing labels and being prescribed psychotropic drugs with many untoward effects.
Vouchers --- Parents, Dont Depend On Them
Vouchers, which give tax money to parents to pay for tuition in private schools, sound good in theory. The problem is that voucher programs are few and very far between.
Give Your Child the Gift of Self-Esteem
Much has been said about the "gifted child" but in truth every child is born with unlimited potential. As expressed so well by Orison Marden:"Deep within man dwell those slumbering powers; powers that would astonish him, that he never dreamed of possessing; forces that would revolutionize his life if aroused and put into action.
8 Tips To Save On Child Care Costs
Child care costs are are one of the most expensive costs associated with going back to work. Finding ways to cut down on child care costs without sacrificing quality child care is a top priority for all working parents.
Childhood friendships are as special as they are a necessary part of growing up. While some of our children will maintain these friendships into adulthood, many will not.
Choosing Wooden Toys For Children
Wooden toys are one of the best alternatives for the huge number of toys made of plastic and other synthetic materials that you can find in all toy stores.In addition, most children's wooden toys are handcrafted.
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