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Parenting Your Teenager: 4 Dangerous Myths
MYTH: All teens have to rebel, and the teen years will be miserable years for a family.
REALITY: Teens do have to separate from their parents and families. That's good - otherwise kids would be living at home when they are 35.
They do, however, have to earn the privilege of being in charge.
MYTH: Once teens rebel, you have lost them forever.
REALITY: This is the fear of every parent, but it doesn't happen in most cases. As the proverb says, "Raise up a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they will not depart from it."
Two very important factors are implied here:
1) At some point, it is likely they could "depart" from what you have taught, and
2) they will come back to it.
This notion is elaborated on in Miller Newton's book "Adolescence: Surviving the Perilous Journey." Miller calls this notion Withdrawal - Isolation - Re-emergence. His view is that all adolescents withdraw, and some will go so far as to isolate themselves. They will, however, re-emerge at some point. Part of the parents' job then is to maintain the connection so a relationship can exist when they re-emerge.
MYTH: Raising teens is easy if you do it right.
REALITY: If you listen to some so-called parenting experts, raising kids - even teens - is a walk in the park.
According to them, the only reason you are having difficulty is because you are doing it wrong (not like them, in other words).
The reality is that parenting is a labor-intensive task. In order to raise kids and teach moral character, you have to go against the prevailing culture.
MYTH: Your teen years were just like those of your teen-ager.
REALITY: Many of the character issues they are dealing with are very much like the ones you faced. But the world, atmosphere and culture in which they are dealing with these issues is incredibly different. Don't make the mistake of thinking it's all the same.
Leading parenting expert Jeff Herring is a teen and family therapist, parenting coach, speaker and syndicated parenting and relationship columnist. Jeff invites you to visit ParentingYourTeenager.com for 100's of tips and tools for parenting through the teenage years. You can also subscribe to his free weekly internet newsletter "ParentingYourTeenager."
Parents and Children Working Together
When parents help their children learn to read, they help open the door to a new world. As a parent, you can begin an endless learning chain: You read to your children, they develop a love of stories and poems, they want to read on their own, they practice reading, and finally they read for their own information or pleasure.
Sibling Rivalry: The Magic Trick That Stops It Instantly
It's a familiar scene: Kids screaming at each other, complaining that, "He got a bigger piece of pie," or "She got to stay up an hour later last night."When sibling rivalry rears its ugly head, what do you do?Try to reason with the kids? Scream, threaten or punish them? Ignore it and run for cover?None of these methods is very effective for very long.
Diapers: Do You Choose Disposable Or Reusable?
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This year alone, 1,600 teenagers aged 15 to 19 will die from committing suicide. Suicide among kids, once a rarity, is now a growing concern in America, and it appears that one of the best ways to keep your kids from doing it is to be a nosy parent.
Our Recommended Eating Program for ADHD
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The Importance of Mothers
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Is My Child Lazy?
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Elephants and Teenagers
Something eerily familiar happened in KwaZulu-Natal's Hluhluwe-Umfolozi Park in Africa recently.The adult elephants were taken away and the orphaned youngsters were left to fend for themselves.
Home For The Holidays: Is it Time for That Talk?
Just a couple of years ago Annie helped her parents get the washer & dryer moved from the basement to a bedroom on the first floor after her mom missed the last step & broke her toe. Annie reassured them that she would make sure they would stay in their own home no matter what.
A Man and His Baby
When a couple steps forth with a baby in tow everything in life is stable and normal. People hold open doors, hard shopkeepers "chuck" and go all gooey before catching themselves and generally life is an easy ride.
Parenting Your Teenager: The 4 Ds of Time with Family
How would you like to have more time? Of course we all want more time. There are just two problems: 1.
Just What Is A Learning Disability?
A learning disability is defined as a permanent problem that affects a person with average to above average intelligence, in the way that he/she receives, stores, and processes information.There are many wrong ideas out there about learning disabilities.
How to Deal with Your Child's Inappropriate Behaviour
Children bombard parents with many challenging behaviours. We are delighted if their behaviour is mostly positive.
The Secret, Unconscious Game Children and Parents Play Where No One Wins!
Did you know there's a game children and parents play all the time and yet, neither of them knows about it? This article discusses this unconscious, no-win game children play with their unknowing parents; how points get scored; why the game isn't a good thing to play, and how parents can stop the game.I wish I could tell you the name of the game.
Are You Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child?
Although many parents are concerned with our children's intelligence quotient (IQ), research shows that a child's emotional quotient (EQ) is just as important for that child's personal success. So what is Emotional Intelligence? Emotional quotient is your child's ability to feel, while intelligence quotient is your child's ability to think.
Is Your Child Becoming A Praise Junkie?
Do you praise your child when he fulfils a basic bodily function? Do you praise your child for obeying the laws of gravity? Do you give praise for simple socialisation procedures that your child practises every day?No, you say. Have you ever praised your child for finishing all his meal? Ever praised a child for staying on his bike or perhaps staying vertical on roller-blades? Ever praised a toddler for their terrific smile and fantastic manners?In the last few decades parents in many parts of the world including the US.
My Stomach Hurts - I Cant Go to School Today!
It's the third time this week that Sam has complained of a headache or Shaundra has an upset stomach. Daniel cries before leaving school and Tanya won't get out of the car upon arrival to the school parking lot.
Top 5 Characteristics of Good Leadership to Instill in Our Home School Children
I am sure that this list can be jogged and added and taken away or all of the above, after being in the presence of several true leaders these are the ones that stuck out in my mind. Our home schooled children can be given a greater chance to make a diference in the world if the are leaders in mind, instead of following others blindly.
War Declared On Instant Messenger: How to Stop Your Child from Wasting Their Life Away Online
Hey Parents! I hate to tell you, but there is no such thing as "useful instant messaging". Your crafty child might try to take advantage of your lack of "Techie" know how when they say in that whiney voice.
Bullies are an ugly but very real part of childhood. There's not much we can do to protect our children from these cruel and brutal kids except teach them how to defend themselves from an otherwise unprovoked attack of the bullying kind.
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