List Categories | List All Articles | List Articles By Title
Couples - Learn to Work Together to Solve Problems
Q. There has to be some way around the continuing battle in our marriage. Both my wife and I like to do things our own way and have things our own way, and so we fight for our own way. Doing it all my way does not work; doing it all her way does not work. This thing is tearing us apart. Can you recommend some way to help us?
A. Are you familiar with the three rings of marriage?
They are the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffer-ring.
A great amount of the suffering in marriage comes from the very battle which you describe in your letter. It's human nature to want to be right and to have things our own way. Some of us raise this to the level of an art form or mandate for life.
The problem is that always doing it your way or always doing it the other person's way will not work over time.
In marriage, the person who always insists on "my way or the highway" will likely become familiar with the highway. You may get to be right - whatever that means - but you do so at the expense of distancing your partner. Always doing it your way limits your potential problem-solving ability since you are using only one brain when two are at your disposal.
One of the best ways to build resentment in someone is to always demand your way.
Some people try to solve this dilemma by just letting their partners always have their way. While this may temporarily keep the peace, it does not last. Little resentments build over time. This process is typically followed by a huge explosion over something that appears to be just a little thing.
One of the many myths of marriage is that our spouse is going to think, or should think, just as we do; we often are offended when he or she doesn't.
In marriage, you do not have to think alike. You do, however, need to think together. Thinking together means becoming like-minded. It does not mean that you think alike, or even always agree. It means you take two sets of ingredients, the best of your thinking and ideas and the best thinking and ideas of your partner, blend them, and come up with solutions that you never would have been able to reach alone.
Jeff Herrring, MS, LMFT is a marriage and family therapist, relationship coach, speaker and nationally syndicated relationship columnist, and founder and CEO of http://www.Couples-Connection.com You can email Jeff at firstname.lastname@example.org and sign up for his free internet newsletter "Couples-Connection on his website at http://www.Couples-Connection.com
Coping with Your Abuser
How to cope with your abuser?Sometimes it looks hopeless. Abusers are ruthless, immoral, sadistic, calculated, cunning, persuasive, deceitful - in short, they appear to be invincible.
Womens Cosmic Personality Quiz: Are You a Star Woman or an Earth Mother?
Star Women are visionary leaders, and focused on the future. Earth Mothers are focused on nurturing, caring, and giving.
Dating Women From Russia: Important Tips The Marriage Agencies Never Tell You
I want to share with you information that the Russian marriage agencies don't tell you on their web sites.Many of the dating agencies tout, how young Russian women are so family oriented and will make wonderful wives and family partners.
Are the Neighbors Next Door Secretly Swinging?
The swinging lifestyle does not discriminate against race, body type, sexuality, social standing or financial stability. There are people successfully living the lifestyle from all walks of life.
Spouse Improvement: Influence Your Partner to Change in Just 7 Steps
Everyone has something they'd like to change in their partner. Here is a 7-step process to create a change in your partner.
Making Passion More Passionate
Somewhere between the first kiss and growing old together, many couples experience dormant growth phases during their relationship, leaving one, if not both partners with a need for greater input, emotionally and/or physically.The process of emotional growth is both independent, and uncomfortable.
Dont Be A Doormat in Your Relationship
There comes a point in every relationship when the person you are dating will do or say something that is out of line. How you react to those situations will determine if they will gain respect for you or whether they will start to see you as a doormat and begin to misbehave even more.
American Women Really Don't Like You
Any man who has dated Asian ladies who live in the United States, has witness the wrath, jealously and prejudice of American women towards Asian ladies. I know I have, as have many of my friends.
Stop Making Relationship Mistakes! Avoid Another Unhappy Relationship!
It is possible for women to steer clear of an unhappy relationship. However, it will require taking an honest look at themselves and their relationship mistakes.
Great Relationship Advice: How to Balance Your Hear at Work with Your Heart at Home
Remember the Tom Cruise movie "Jerry Maguire?"From my seat in the theater, this movie had a much more valuable message than it's catch phrase "show me the money."Tom Cruise plays the title character Jerry Maguire, a fast moving sports agent who lives for the big score and makes big money.
One minute you seem like lovesick turtledoves teasing, laughing and giggling with all your might. Then a few minutes later, you begin yelling and berating each other and a lover's quarrel is already in progress.
Should You Forgive Infidelity?
If you're asking yourself that question, then somewhere within you there must be a desire to forgive the other person. After all, if you knew 100% for sure without doubts that you definitely should NOT forgive, then you wouldn't be entertaining the question, right? You would have already said your goodbyes and would be moving on with your new life and licking your wounds.
Successful on the Outside, Lonely on the Inside: Our Hidden Epidemic
I say "Loneliness. Isolation.
Does Age Matter?
In the Asian online dating world it is not uncommon for a older gentlemen to marry a younger lady. If you ask why this is the case, you'll get a varied amount of comments.
Relationship Advice: A Tip from Monica and Chandler of Friends
If you are looking for it, you can find relationship advice and wisdom in all kinds of places.I found an important piece of relationship advice recently while watching a "Friends" rerun.
Learn the Six Secrets of Chemical Romance
What is Chemical Romance? It's a scientific approach to seduction that reveals how to unleash the natural chemicals in the body. Have you ever felt an instant connection with someone you just met? Have you ever fallen in love at first sight?If yes, then you have experienced the powerful effects of chemical romance.
Relationship Advice for Women - Beyond the Happy Ending - Part 2 The Not-the-Same Syndrome
How often do we complain that our man isn't romantic enough or he doesn't treat you like he did when you first started dating? Come on, admit it, we do this a lot. The way I see it, there are two sides to this.
The Big Secret of Age
Think back to when you were a child. Pick a time when you were aware of the world and starting to notice things around you, perhaps 10 or 11 years old.
How a Three Letter Word Kills Good Relationships
"You know, I really do love fish!" My friend Steve came up with this profound comment as we were about to tuck into the gastronomic offerings before us in a crowded downtown restaurant. I raised my eyebrows.
Whats in a Kiss
Just think of being in front of a warm cracking with you partner in your hands, with a kiss and a cuddle. But have you ever thought about why people kiss? It could be a greeting or a sign of affection, but we all kiss.
home | site map
All articles are copyright to their owners.
Note: this website lists articles, We do not Write Articles !