List Categories | List All Articles | List Articles By Title
Learn To Fail - Its Good For You!
As a child you probably learned failing is bad...
Failing meant being punished, whether it is being kept in for "remedial work" after school or having to repeat a year. Failing meant getting a dressing down from your parents, and some form of restriction on your activities until you 'knuckle down and start to get good grades'. So, a vital part of your learning tool kit was taken away from you.
What do I mean? Well, those people who learn most are the people for whom failing is okay.
All that failing does is show up those areas you have yet to master a particular skill, activity or subject. Full Stop.
On the other hand, all that achieving something does is show you have mastered this particular topic and you are ready to move on.
Chances are, you have watched a very young child learning to walk.
From checking out all these big people, our little one realises there are whole range of benefits from being able to walk upright, rather than crawling everywhere.
So she decides to try it out for herself.
She pulls herself upright on the coffee table and with a great amount of uncertainty puts one little chubby foot out and starts to transfer the weight from the back foot onto the front one.
But its very hard to balance on such a small area, particularly when the muscle tone isn't great, and she topples over and lands flat on her face.
Ouch! That hurt.
So after Mommy or Daddy have given her a cuddle and kissed it all better, she gets left to herself again.
What happens next? Well I'll tell you what doesn't happen.
Our little one does not crawl across into the corner and hang her head in shame, thinking "I blew it. I'm a failure. I'll never be able to walk" No. She hasn't learned that trick yet.
What happens is she tries it again, adjusting for the problem that happened last time.
So she pulls herself up on the coffee table again and this time over corrects and, boom, flat on her bottom. That's okay, well padded, didn't hurt. And she learns that if she is going to fall, its better to come down on her rear end than on her face.
So she tries it again, and again, and again until in a very short period of time she has mastered a very complex combination of balance and motion we call walking.
And she was able to do it because it was okay to fail.
She took her failures and her successes to achieve what she wanted. Fantastic.
But as she grows and becomes socialised, and learns that failing is bad, she becomes fearful of not making the grade first time every time. So she gives up trying new things. And irrational fear takes hold.
Now fear can be a good thing. Fear keeps us from venturing into situations that may be harmful for us. But it becomes bad when it stops us from achieving things in our lives we would otherwise be quite capable of doing.
Fear of failure is a classic blocking mechanism that stops us from living a fulfilled life.
Fear of rejection is another.
Fear of the unknown.
Even fear of success.
Fear of success? Yes, there are people who are afraid to become successful because they might not be able to handle it. They are afraid they will lose all their friends, that they won't know how to cope with all the decisions they will have to make, all the extra responsibility they will have. These people still see success as an end result, rather than a journey
And what happens if you do fail?
Is the world going to come crashing down around your ears?
Of course not.
Are you going to die?
In fact, failing simply tells you those areas where you have more opportunities to grow.
And if you learn anything from the experience, how could you consider it a failure?
Thomas Edison, the inventor to whom we are indebted for inventions such as the light globe and the phonograph was once asked how he coped with all his failures (he was unsuccessful in about 90% of the things he did) Edison's answer was quite profound. He said
"I have never failed. I have successfully learned what does not work!"
Make your standard for being successful very easy to achieve, you would also do well to make your standard for failure extremely difficult.
For me, failure is completely giving up on absolutely everything. Not even bothering to get out of bed. In essence, to stop living, without actually dying. To lose all interest in and contact with others and give up. Until I reach that point, and I never plan to get to that stage in my life, I do not consider myself a failure, Despite the disappointments, despite the "successful lessons in learning what does not work", despite the things that have gone badly, I continue to be successful.
And here's a closing though to ponder: you can't be a successful failure, because if you're good at failing at least you are successful at something!
Graham Hunt is the founder of Prentis Carpenter Center, an organisation established to resource an environment where people who choose to do so can discover and achieve their potential. One way in which Graham is doing that is through his website at http://www.higher-self-esteem-site.com/ Come visit anytime.
Reach Your Goals - Throw A Success Shindig
Once you've made it..
Success Lessons From Josey Wales
The Outlaw Josey Wales is an interesting Western that I have watched many times. It is full of success lessons for the discerning!A Missouri farmer joins a Confederate guerilla unit to avenge the murder of his wife and son and winds up on the run from the Union soldiers who killed his family.
3 Keys to Fulfill Your Wildest Dreams
If you'd like to fulfill your long-held dreams, try a radical approach. Radical people create their own breakthroughs for getting the job, love and health they really want.
If You're Not Where You Want To Be In Life, It's Your Own Fault
Have you ever wondered why you're not where you want to be in life?Fact is, we both have at one time or another.I know I certainly have.
We Become What We Think About
"A man's life is what his thoughts make of it."- Marcus Aurelius -Roman EmperorRalph Waldo Emerson once stated, "a man is what he thinks about all day long.
Skills or Beliefs: Which Matters Most to Your Business?
Skills or beliefs; this may well be another example of the age-old "chicken or the egg" dilemna. I tend to side more strongly with beliefs.
Be Successful : Take Back Control of Your Life
What would happen if you lived your life by design rather than by default?What would happen if you took the time to choose what you wanted in life rather than letting life choose it for you?I am sure that many of you know people who appear to be living their lives on 'autopilot', rather than in control of their own personal destiny. They get up in the morning, get ready to work, drive to work using the same route, do their daily work tasks, drive home from work using the same route as before, eat dinner, perhaps play with the kids, watch TV and then go to bed.
Creating A Life You Love
Imagine that right now, right here, today? there is within your grasp not one but several opportunities to redesign specific aspects of your life so that the sum total is a life you absolutely love. Then imagine that the only thing standing between you and your opportunities is a closed mind, fear, habits, concern, worry, drama, or perhaps mental, physical, and emotional clutter.
The Secret to Success in 2004 (or any year)
Do you want to achieve your most important goals in 2004? In my opinion it gets down to two simple words, "easy" and "neglect".People often ask me how I became successful at the early age of 31, while many of the people I knew did not.
4 Scientific Strategies to Become Brilliant At Anything
In this brief article we will explore four methods that real world achievers use to outshine their peers and become history makers.1.
You Are What You Think You Are
Think out of the box, they say. But what's a box?In the context of the discussion here the 'box' is the sub-conscious mind.
Visualize Your Way to Success
Human beings are visual creatures. Our imaginations are powerful tools that can bring us to the brink of despair or create a wonderful new reality.
It Takes Competence to Change!
This article is about a subject that few people think of when "change" is mentioned. The topic is COMPETENCE.
5 Steps to Greater Workplace Productivity
Step 1 - Learn a powerful key to increase financial successYantras are a visual representation of a mantra. A mantra is a sound that resonates in the atmosphere and creates a specific effect.
Who Wants to be a Millionaire?
I do! I want to be a millionaire! Do you?Judging by the number of lotteries and TV game shows that offer million-dollar or multi-million dollar prizes, becoming a millionaire has become a global obsession. Every day there is at least one new millionaire.
Gratitude, Faith, and Clarity of Purpose -- The Most Powerful Statement
"Things might have been worse"This is the most powerful, dynamic, revolutionary statement you could ever make in your life.But first, deciding to take an inventory your life will lead you to put down in front of you two parts of your life:1.
Are you successful? What does that word mean to you? Unlimited wealth, "toys" as far as the eye can see, or family gatherings at your cottage on the lake?Success is a state of mind, and I would like to help you Succeed! Below are some dynamic belief steps to follow.S - Start believing in yourself and what you do! Starting=beginning.
Can Anyone Become A Successful Business Person?
Can anyone become a successful businessperson? I am asked this question many times after I have given a speech on business procedures and strategies. The answer is not that simple.
Have You Planned Your New Years Revolutions?
Revolution:a sudden, radical, or complete change a fundamental change in the way of thinking about or visualizing something a change of paradigmI can think of no better way to begin this New Year than by initiating a revolution, or perhaps several.A resolution is defined as a "firm resolve".
Help Yourself To Success
If you help yourself, God and humans will help you too. Start helping yourself to achieve your goals with commitment and perseverance and others, including God or the Universe, will be attracted into your life to assist you.
home | site map
All articles are copyright to their owners.
Note: this website lists articles, We do not Write Articles !