List Categories | List All Articles | List Articles By Title
After WLS: Goodbye Self-Loathing! Hello Self-Loving!
You won't believe what happened to me today!
I was getting ready for work and saw myself naked in the full-length mirror and I didn't hate what I saw! I actually gave myself an unrehearsed slightly passive self-compliment "You don't look bad today."
The reason this is monumental is because most of the time when I look in the mirror I do not like what I see and I give myself harsh criticism. I suppose after years of self-loathing that it is more comfortable to degrade my appearance than to appreciate it.
Many patients report hyper-judging their bodies after weight loss; it seems the thinner we get the more judgmental we are of our bodies. These days I'm critical of thighs that seem a bit jiggly and some very unattractive cottage cheese dimples on my rear end. Loathing these body parts keeps me from appreciating a thin waist, toned arms or those curious collarbones that were in hiding for so many years.
Body dysmorphic disorder is a mental image many victims of anorexia nervosa have that tells them they look fat, even when they are emaciated. Morbidly obese people and bariatric patients can suffer from body dysmorphia as well. One reader, ThereseD, posted this message regarding body perception:
"Body Dysmorphia is REAL! Over five years after my open RNY gastric bypass and I got hit with it again just last night, when I was cleaning out my closet. My daughter commented that my new shirt, which I was so proudly placing at the front, was too big and needs to go in the "go" pile. I checked the label and sure enough, it said "Large". Following my revision surgery of April 18, 2005, I still have my bandages and I'm probably wearing a size 4 Petite . . . and still I put on a smart and stylish new top in a size that's just too big for me! Oops!"
When we were morbidly obese our emotional coping mechanisms kicked in and many of us were able to convince ourselves we really weren't that big. It is emotionally kinder to avoid body criticism. The whole issue of obesity seems hopeless. In fact, many morbidly obese patients will say they see themselves normal sized. That is until rude moments remind them they are not normal sized: a skinny chair, a turnstile, a bathroom stall, a flight of stairs, a photograph. This false perception is a subconscious coping strategy to protect us from the brutal truth, the truth about how big morbidly obese really is.
After surgery, there is a tendency for the body dysmorphia to reverse. Before surgery we denied how big we were, after surgery we judge ourselves critically - like the anorexic - and fail to see an honest reflection. One woman, down from size 24 to size 10 wrote, "I feel fat daily. I never felt this at 248 pounds - I saw a thinner person in the mirror than I see now. I look at my size 10 jeans and they look like tents. I don't feel as attractive as I did when I was heavy. I don't understand it," she continued, "but I think it has to do with learning to accept yourself fat so you didn't see all the fat. Now I just have to learn to accept myself as thinner."
It has been suggested that dressing in stylish clothes that fit is one way to beat the body blues. Another idea, as Therese suggested, is having a bystander who will be honest about our appearance. Therese wrote, "My daughter's the number one person I go to, when I need to cure the myopic view of myself that I've developed."
I wish I knew what magic happened this morning that I accepted and appreciated my own body. If I could package that magic I would personally mail it to every reader of LivingAfterWLS.com - we ALL deserve to love and appreciate ourselves. It's time for the self-loathing to end and the self-appreciation to begin.
Kaye Bailey © 2005- All Rights Reserved
Kaye Bailey is a weight loss surgery success story having maintained her health and goal weight for 5+ years. An award winning journalist, she is the author and webmaster of http://www.livingafterwls.com and http://www.livingafterwls.blogspot.com
Fresh & insightful content is added daily, check in often.
To subscribe to the LivingAfterWLS monthly newsletter "You Have Arrived" click on http://www.livingafterwls.com and enter your details in the subscription box.
Weight Loss/Control Glossary of Terms
A Little Help With Some Difficult terms ------------------------------------------ Aerobic Exercise. Any activity involving large muscles, done for an extended period of time.
Serious Dieting Tips, Humorous Explanations
A few months ago, I set out to lose 22.6 pounds, then to put back on at least half of it.
Weight Loss: Customize, Personalize, Spice up!
You know you have weighted, err, waited more than enough. So you decide to get yourself started on some weight loss programs and regimens.
Gastric Bypass Patients Should Include Tomatoes in Their Diet
After weight loss surgery it is important to include as many healthy foods in our diet as possible while still respecting the the restrictive nature gastric bypass system. One of the foods that many patients report having a high tolerance for is tomatoes.
Why You Should Burn Body Fat
Are you overweight? Then you probably want to lose some weight. It is obvious that you'll burn body fat by increasing your metabolism.
Dieting: A Few Dieting Pitfalls To Avoid
When we gain more weight than is good for us, we're forced to start dieting.It is easier to gain weight than to lose it.
Slowing Down Can Help You Lose Weight Faster
Running For Weight Loss??.Slow DownYou may be out running your fat burning hormonesSo you've loved running since your track days of high school.
Walking: A Key to Weight Loss
Doctors prescribe Walking as the best medicine for weight loss.We walk everyday.
Results Not Typical
I had 14 weight/health-oriented newsletters in my inbox this morning. (Subscribe to one or two lists and they will multiply -- the rabbits of the Internet!)Several contained testimonials from rabid fans of their particular diet program.
Weight Loss: Weight Loss is All in Your Mind!
"The kind of thoughts that you plant in your mind, determine what you produce in life." Letting negative thoughts rule your mind can never make you achieve your goal.
How to Eat Out and Lose Weight
Diners have become more health-conscious the last few years, and now want healthy choices whether eating at home or at their favorite restaurants. Luckily, the restaurant industry has been quick to accommodate the demand, so you'll find you have many options to "eat healthy" these days.
Malnutrition Causes Obesity
Axiom Number One - Nourish your body.Probably the most important and least understood axiom of successful weight loss is that you have to nourish your body.
Close Kept Secrets to Weight Loss
Discover secrets to overcome food addictions by releasing negative thoughts and reframing with powerful affirmations, and manifest all that is yours by Divine right.My name is Tami Close and my intention is to empower women to realize they are responsible for their own health and well-being.
Empower Your Shopping Experience
Healthy living begins with healthy eating and healthy eating begins with healthy shopping..
Exercise and Low Carb Diets Make Poor Partners
Over the last twenty five years the most common questioned asked me by frustrated exercisers, has been what exercise routine will get me the body I desire? My answer is always the same. They need to start exercising better judgement and learn that exercise alone will not solve their body composition problem.
Waist To Hip Ratio
Your health is affected not only by how much body fat you have, but also by where most of the fat is located on your body. Waist to hip ratio (WHR) analyzes the relationship between your waist and hip measurements to help you understand your body-type and current health status.
Are Low Carb Diets Good for Everyone?
What's a Low Carb Diet Really Mean?When I hear low carb to me it means, "low sugar," or "less processed foods." If we'd all make an effort to avoid chips, cookies, cakes, high corn syrup drinks, and candy, then we'd be reducing our overall carbs and eating more healthfully at the same time.
Four Steps to Hunger Control
Axiom Number Two: Hunger ControlTrying to lose weight without understanding how to control your hunger -impossible. Probably the main reason so many diets fail is because they ignore hunger.
Eat Fat to Burn Fat
For about 50 years now, Americans have been eating low fat (some no fat) diets and the funny thing is we have gotten progressively fatter and less healthy. Who ever said low fat diets were healthy, and more importantly, why does eating less fat mean you'll be less fat?In attempt to keep this easy to understand, as most of what you read and hear is complicated, confusing, and contradictory, I'm going to be direct, to the point, and explain things in a way that most people can understand.
10 Easy to follow Tips to help YOU Lose Weight
Dieting is not easy. If it were, we would probably all be thin.
home | site map
All articles are copyright to their owners.
Note: this website lists articles, We do not Write Articles !